Sunday, September 2, 2007

Dog Gone

I stroll down the runway, all eyes are on me. Everyone wants a piece of me; "Jean Knee , over here...over here Jean Knee , over here, pick me, pick me ,pick me!"

"I love you!! you are fabulous!!!!!!! Wooowww she looked right at me!!!!, Jean Knee, May I lick your hand?!!!!!!"

HUH?

Just strollin down the runway, that's me. " hellooooo everyone,,thank you thank you, hello, how you doin?" You wnat to fullfill this same dream?????? Of course you do. Take yourself to the nearest animal shelter, stroll down the dog-runway and this could be you.

This was me on Saturday. A long Holiday weekend. What better time to choose a new companion for my dalmatian, Polka Dot? HMMMMMMM so many cheerful, longing faces, wagging tales. Oh the pressure, how to choose just one? the right one? For Polka Dot? Try them all out of course.....

Some hours later we've adopted a black lab mix, female, 2 year old canine. Named Penny.

Penny meets Polka Dot, they sniff each other, scuffle, repeat. She checks the yard out, we pet and play with them for quite a while. I go inside, return after 15 minutes. They've had their first dominance fight. Polka Dot got his mass kicked, in a big way (so glad I missed it, that's my Polka Dot she's messing with!) Pet-n- play lots more, we venture inside. Things seem calm outside, no scuffling or growling, ahhhh, the sweet feel of a family gently melding together.

We go outside to praise Penny. She's gone, she jumped a 5 foot fence and is running with the neighbor dogs.

Repeat all of the above countless times. COUNTLESS TIMES. We take shifts breaking up fights, returning errant dog to fence on and on and on. We are invited to a swim party, oh no we can't go because we have a toddler, er new dog, to look out for. On and on and on and on.
Through a Holiday weekend. Yes, this could be you.

to be continued.... I know the absolute total suspense is killing you...it's killing me too,.. . .literally

















GUESS WHICH ONE IS POLKA DOT

22 comments:

No Cool Story said...

It's all fun and games until someone looses an eye.
That's waht my Grandma always said. Does it apply to dogs?

This dog can jump over 5 ft. Have you ever considered joining a circus? At least you could make money out of Penny.

Thoroughly Mormon Millie said...

Hee hee, NCS' comment was funny. :)

Wow, you are so brave... I'd go nuts with a new dog. Seriously nuts. No, I'm not even kidding - nuts. Like, Haldol nuts. My hat is off to you, girl.

Tori :) said...

I agree with NCS- the circus is the place for y'all, I mean, your dog... She could jump thru hoops or something.
We had a kitten for like 2 days. I couldn't handle the whining. That's why we have a snake.

Bee said...

A doggie I had went missing a long time ago and we went to look for him at the anti-cruelty place here in Chi-Town... I wanted to bring every dog home with me!

You know what they say "all dogs are like their owners" (except for the butt smelling part) so maybe if you stopped jumping the fence...

Bee said...

BTW, I'll probably be posting the stalking questions tomorrow...
The identity will be kept a secret but you have been forewarned! :op

Lisa said...

It's a case for my favorite tv personality-Cesar Milan! Call him. In 30 minutes or less (at least that is what it seems like) he will have your new Penny under his submissive control.

But I have to say they are cute! And my youngest is a dalmatian lover and collects stuffed dalmatians. And she wants a dog of her very own, to which I will direct her to your blog. No way!

B said...

When I went to the Animal Shelter to look for my lost kitty, I did that "walk" in the cat kennel. It broke my heart and I left in tears, not only because I didn't find my Baby, but I wanted to rescue every single one of those cats!
O, maybe Penny could teach you how to jump the fence at Lean's school and get you past the gestapo there!
:D Brenda

Jean Knee said...

UPDATE
Penny is doing better about beating polka dot up byt she is still jumping the fence.

she is very sweet just needs some discipline.

Jean Knee said...

if that dog jumps the fence one more effin time I will go crazy.
the kind of crazy prozac won't help
the kind of crazy electroshock can't fry out of you

stop..jumping...the ...frekin fence

elasticwaistbandlady said...

Are you secretly racist, jean knee? Why only dogs in black and white? Where's your brown dog? How come you don't have canine diversity in your home? I have brown eyes and brown hair. Does that mean you don't like me either?

elasticwaistbandlady said...

My Reagan got his head stuck under the sofa today trying to hide during a huge thunderstorm. Too bad he didn't fish the long lost socks and other crap out from under the sofa while he was there.

elasticwaistbandlady said...

Oh, and we added some new dogs to our family this holiday weekend too!

Their names are Hebrew National and Oscar Meyer. Hebrew is nicer, though, since having a weiner bris done. Oy!

Lei said...

Fun, fun, fun. Know what else is fun? Winning a give-away. Email me so I can send it out to you woman!!!

Melissa said...

Our neighbors dog used to jump our fence every time there was a loud noise. Scared the crap out of us one 4th of July as this huge mass came bounding over the fence in the darkness... good times
I hope Miss Penny will learn to stay at home and quit runnin off with those kids on the street.

Jean Knee said...

Lisa: beware of dalmatians, they can be high strung. ours is a dalmatian mix that we saved from death row from the same shelter.
he took a long time to train, but it was worth it, he is really sweet

Elastic: I am a peerfectionist who chooses her dogs to go with her decor and to generally be an accessory to make her look good. It's not easy getting Penny and Polka into my giant black and white cow hide shoulder bag. once they are in I look better than Paris
did you just make a foreskin joke?
only you could make foreskin funny

Millie: please send me some of that haldol...please

tori and NCS- we are not circus freaks!! the outrage!! (we tried to join but their standards were too high)

elasticwaistbandlady said...

Those are some very cute dogs. I think your blog is very cute. All of the comments you make are very cute, too! LOL!

I like the Ziggy comic strip. Do you? He's very cute.

Sunshine, Lollipops, and Rainbows Everything To You Today, Jean Knee.......even though you haven't committed to celebrating Sheena Easton Day with me yet.

Bee said...

JEAN KNEE, DID YOU STEAL MY DOG?! SHE WAS HERE A MINUTE AGO AND NOW SHE'S GONE! ALL THAT'S LEFT IS A CRAZY COCK!

normanbatesmomma said...

I never let my Norman have pets. Sometimes he has such a Jeffrey Dahlmer-ish side to his personality...

Bee said...

No, but I've got yours!




Sorry I'm re-doing it cuz I had a dumb typo!

Kimberly said...

Dang, girl! I get enough of that kind of behavior from my kids. Good luck'n'stuff...

Bee said...

Hey, I just thought o' somthin'...
Polka Dot Knee and Penny Knee!
Ha! Good stuff you're brilliant! :o)

elasticwaistbandlady said...

Just admit that you're a Ziggy lover. Admit it!

I think you secretly still oooh and ahhh over Family Circus too.