Saturday, January 5, 2008

Cereal Substitute

We had our nephew visit this week so you can imagine that breakfast cereal consumption shot way up. It is just about the only thing I can cram into Lean because she is never hungry in the morning. Of course I buy into that nutritional propaganda that breakfast is the most important meal of the day. If someone said it sometime or other then it's probably true, right?





Only too bad for me cause we ran out of cereal. Now I am very handy in the kitchen (just look at all the heart hobbling recipes I've come up with using the waffle maker 4000) so I felt very sure that I could come up with a cereal substitute. I read the list of ingredients and went to work in my kitchen mixing, pouring, stirring, until I came up with the perfect cereal alternative.



And here it is: a cup of sugar with a child's vitamin on top. Sprinkle with one tablespoon of bleached and over processed white flour, and drink a glass of chocolate milk. This breakfast contains all of the main ingredients in cereal. Let me break it down for you:
  1. sugar, the main ingredient in anything edible
  2. white flour, need that fiber to keep things flowing,baby!
  3. vitamin, oh yes indeedy cereals are vitamin fortified
  4. chocolate milk, the artificial chemicals from the chocolate flavoring are needed to make it as close to actual cereal as you can get

Yum! Let the noshing begin.

42 comments:

for a different kind of girl said...

My kids now wonder when they can start calling you "Mom".

Bee said...

Okay, I'll go back to read your post in a second but I just saw that picture and I thought "WHAT THE...!!"

Bee said...

If you get a knock on the door, don't open it! It my DCFS or DFCS or DFFSCSS. not sure what it is but it stands for Department of Children Services Affairs of the heart, coming for Lean and the rooster.

catieann said...

the cereal alternative cracks me up! CatieAn here. I am visiting everyone who signed up for my give away. Nice to meet you. Love your stuff..
catie

Brian o Vretanos said...

As someone who doesn't usually eat breakfast, you're not exactly persuading me to start. Surely if it's the most important meal of the day, it should be steak or something?

The "full English" breakfast follows that kind of philosophy and would compliment your other "heart-hobbling" recipes.

Jean Knee said...

I've had that full english breakfast--what's the deal with those stewy tomatoes and all those puddings?

Brian o Vretanos said...

I'm not sure about the tomatoes, other than that in canteens they tend to have a bain marie full of them, so I suppose it's easier than cooking tomatoes fresh.

I'm not really keen on white pudding, but black pudding's really nice. I suppose the main thing is having a good variety of things on the plate.

All this is making me hungry and I've already had my tea...

Jean Knee said...

I'm trying to put off my cholestrol test as long as possible -olive oil spray is just not as good as butter
all the fake butters are fake

Jean Knee said...

Hey, I just saw the date---It's Three King's Day!!!!!!

so much to do..........

Millie said...

We Three Kings of Orient are,
Tried to smoke a rubber cigar.
It was loaded,
It exploded -
*BOOM*

This post cracked me up so bad. You are an amazing woman. There's nothing you can't do.

Mrs. Crybaby Jones said...

Seeing that cup of sugar with a vitamin on top made me cry with joy. At LAST! Something my child will eat!

Jean Knee said...

just seeing you cry is payment enough, really.

Brian o Vretanos said...

Special Day:

The Spanish children get their presents, and the Greeks lob crucifixes into the sea then swim after them.

Bee said...

Natalia got a piano today for three kings...
wonka wonka

Jean Knee said...

Wow, we're only eating southwest chicken to celebrate

elasticwaistbandlady said...

The snap, crackle, pop is actually the sound of your teeth falling out.

No Cool Story said...

You all bcak off Jean Knee's cereal alternative.

Dry cereal is ALWAYS good cereal.

Sarah B. B. said...

When in the world did they start making gummy bear vitamins???? I remember those nasty chalky ones. Sheesh. Today's kids have it so freaking easy.

B said...

At first glance at that cup I thought the vitamin was a piece of the Fudge-A-Gator! :)

Melissa said...

Reminds me of the Bill Cosby bit... "Dad is great! He gives us chocolate cake!" ;)

Bee said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Bee said...

That cup of sugar isn't looking so bad right about now. 7 more days before my mom comes home and I eat again. How old am I? 35 sad years sad sad.

Cereal Substituters of America said...

We approve!

My Little Pony said...

I like the pretty pink teacup.

Friends of Gummi Bears Worldwide Inc. said...

I hope that bear was trapped during Gummi Bear season.

From Me to You said...

I saw this and thought of you.

sugababy Jones said...

my mama gave me this for breakfast, lunch and dinner.

Please, make her stop!

No Cool Story said...

I love you, you heathen!!

So there.

Non-ghey women lovers of the world said...

We approve!

No Cool Story said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Charlie the unicorn said...

I still have Candy Mountain nightmares!

compulsive writer said...

Tee hee! You're brilliant!

Mrs. Crybaby Jones said...

Hey, I gave this to my kid this morning and she sweetened right up AND got all her vitamins. I can't think of any better breakfast.

Leonardo DiCapitated said...

I can't eat anything since I lost my head.

How dare you mock my disability.

lend me some sugah, I am yo neighbah, inc. said...

We approve!

No, YOU'RE a burro!!! said...

Heyyyyy... that burrito link is just rude.

Jean Knee said...

Oh my gosh!!! my blog is becoming so popular, so many new commentors

Jean Knee said...

Listen up gummy bear assc.--that is a gummy princess vitamin I'll have you know!

Jean Knee said...

Sugar is an entirely renewable resourse, it's true

Dapoppins said...

Now if you could add caffeine for the adult version, I would so buy it. Wait. Isn't that Coke?

Jean Knee said...

indeed it is

wynne said...

Ha. I think it may have MORE nutritional value than cereal...