Thursday, November 1, 2007

The Good, the Bad, and the Ancient

Who just said that? Was that you Brian??? No, this is not a post about Mother Teresa,,Bee,,and Jean Knee. The outrage!! I am not ancient! The other two are correct however.

Candy-fest 2007 has, sadly, come to an end. The only thing left to console myself with is, well, candy. Remember NCS posted about bad candy; dum dums and those peanut butter caramels, and I will have to add candy corn to that list,ewww.
Good candy- snickers, anything chocolate, more chocolate.

I now have to add a new category to that; the ancient. Oh my! Trick or treating was uneventful, just the usual: ring doorbell, get candy, be reminded by your mom,again, to say thank you....... the usual.

Once we got back home Lean tore into her candy and told me she just ate a chocolate egg and showed me half, it was one of those snicker egg things. MMMM I love those, hope there's another one for mee..mmm..... Wait a minute, I'm ejected from my chocolate daydreams as a rather abrupt and shocking thought permeates my candy smitten brain. Isn't that an Easter candy??? Why would that be in there????
Someone gave my Lean an ancient, unwanted Easter treat from the linty bottom of a junk drawer. The Horror"
My rational part knows that candy isn't likely to rot because it is made of mostly sugar. But my mom brain is thinking ewwww my kid can't eat rotten candy!!

Of course, I dig around to make sure no more affronts to good taste are present(pun intended) and sure enough I find an Easter tootsie roll. The bunny must have been extra generous at some one's house, but please, you don't have to share your rejects, really.
Further excavation reveals a Santa Claus chocolate and a heart shaped sponge bob morsel. Three major Holidays here, none of which are Halloween. Who did this and why? If candy hasn't been eaten within a month after the actual holiday throw it away people. Just...let...go. If you have no fresh candy give out quarters or turn out your light.
Just....let....go...there is hope for you, see your doctor. Don't let this happen again.


No Cool Story said...

How dare they? For shame. Rotten, mummified candy from past holidays...on the other hand Jean Knee, Father Al would be pleased with their attempts to be green.

OH the dilemma!

No Cool Story said...

I had 3/4 bowl full of candy left, when my last trick-or-treaters (2) showed up and I gave them the whole thing.
Boy, I bet their mom was HAPPY.

Jean Knee said...

I never thought "what would Father Al do"? but really, eating candy that is truly green is just too much

that mom is probably going to egg your house after those kiddies come down from their sugar high

Thoroughly Mormon Millie said...

Groooooooo-deeeeeeeeeeeeeee. Poor Lean. You should retrace your steps and find out who it was, and sue their pants off. Easter candy on Halloween...

My friend Sariah told me she buys all her Halloween candy the day after Halloween when it's 50% off. I was like, gross, so it sits around for a whole year? Then she said, "And I freeze it so the next year, it's still good!" and I breathed a secret sigh of relief.

Bee said...

A Bee quickie!:

Don't come over to my house then! I told you I was giving out left over candy from easter baskets and santa's stale body!!
Jeez I try to do something nice!

Okay back to work.

Later jean knee!

(still waiting for zombie Al)

[tapping my foot impatiently]

Jean Knee said...

of course logically I know the candy is fine, but with chocolate you can have bugs hatch out and that is just grooooossss

lollipops would be okay

Brian o Vretanos said...

If it was me, then as a responsible parent, I'd have tried some myself, just to make sure it was okay...

In fact, I don't mind providing a chocolate tasting service, if you want - just send me samples of anything you're unsure about.

Annie said...

I've hidden all 20 lbs of the kids candy underneath my desk! They will never think to look for it there! MUUUWAHHAHAHAAAAAAAA!

Anonymous said...


Jean Knee said...

I'll find and gut you, annonymous

Anonymous said...

You’ll run cuz my guts will spill out stale candy.

Tori :) said...

Eeew!! Are you kidding me?? I guess not since you posted pics as proof. That's just wrong.

No Cool Story said...

What would Father Al do? Would he eat green candy?

Hey! That Santa's chocolate wrapper has a hole...ewwww!! EEEWWWW!!

Anon has stale candy guts!
Anon has stale candy guts!
nananana boo boo

The Brown Submarine said...

Is that candy brown?

You know the rules....flush it down!

elasticwaistbandlady said...

Did you know that one of those wretched Spice Girl chicks has done a cover of 'I Want Candy?'

Well, she ain't getting none of mine. I believe in performance based rewards. She's getting a bag full of Reagan droppings.

elasticwaistbandlady said...

And now I'm gonna learn you a little trick my momma taught me.

You buy Christmas candy the day after for half off. Then you wrap it in red paper and give it away as Valentines Day gifts.

My Mom is an evil candy-scheming genius.

Bee said...

I came to say something but Millie's bacon made me hungry... mmmmm bacon...

Jean Knee said...

brown submarine, father al says if it's yellow let it mellow, that tootsie roll is white ( vanilla flavored, I know all wrong, an abomination) so what do I do bout that?

Jean Knee said...

I want candy by bow wow wow? cuz that ain't right,

send those droppings fast, maybe they'll choke her out of singing

Jean Knee said...

elastic, see that christmas thing is fine cause it's only 2 months old, not enough time for bugs to hatch out abd all

Jean-Uh said...

Hey its Jean-Uh

whats up
I do like your comments for Father Gore
Happy Thanksgiving