Lean went to a skating party this afternoon. She was pretty nervous because she's never been skating. My secret plan was to don skates myself and help her around the rink. I had to wear a pair of Drew's socks because my inheritance is getting a bit shabby for public appearances.
Ahhh, I remember skating in Jr. High. The best was when they played Dream Weaver and dimmed the lights and flashed colored lights around. "OOOOH dream weaver, I believe you can get me through the nig-hight."
I was a little apprehensive because, well let's face it, forty something is not the best age for skating. But hey, I remember the fast skaters always watched out for the young or coordination challenged. All will be well.
I look out at the crowd and my word, all bets were off. Those tweens were going at least 50 MPR out there. I don't know what they've done to the new skates but I could barely follow their laps around. Plus they were trying to trip each other and push each other into the wall. And no one did anything about it. It looked like an episode of Roller Derby without protective pads and helmet. All plans of reliving my glory days and showing Lean the ropes were dashed. DASHED.
I decided to order a cup of hot chocolate to calm my nerves, but wow the counter girl didn't know how to make it. She had to get the manager, the manager walked her through it, ten minutes have now passed, my gawd just stir the powder in some hot water how stinkin hard can that be?? She finally started trying to stir it but it didn't mix up because, hello, the water wasn't hot. She puts it in the microwave, styrofoam cup and all and no way I'm drinking that poisoned mess of chemicals so I just leave. Lean has been calling me, the girl is never gonna get it right and twenty minutes of my important life are gone ..just...like...that.
There was some delicious chocolate frosted cookie cake that was yum. No forks but hey I stuffed it on in with no incidents. mmm
The rest of the time was pretty mundane just taking Lean around. As we were leaving one of the fathers gave be the old hairy eyeball, even turned around twice to check me out. Maybe no re-captured youth but, baby I still got it.
I checked myself in my car mirror and I had a HUGE smear of chocolate frosting on one side of my lips. Oh the horror!! No one even told me.
It still could have been my hawtness he was checking out, you don't know.