Monday, September 29, 2008

Miss Havisham


Miss Havisham wore her ruined wedding dress until the day she died. But all was not in vain. I found her, dusted her off and now she and Lizzie Borden are friends. They may even have tea together. If they do, Miss Havisham can serve her moldering wedding cake. Lizzie can slice it with her axe. Best Friends Foreveh


Pip would be proud.


Look how long her hair has grown during all those lonely years. Fabulous!

Saturday, September 27, 2008

I Tried The Gravity Method

Ahhh back to school. New backpacks, new clothes, new school supplies. New cold germs flying around the classroom. Lean brought home the first cold of the new school year. Fine for her she had it two days, a week and a half later I still have it but now its morphed into a sinus infection.

So I'm in Dr. Grimm's office (remember him? the one who took my caffeine and reason for living away? He's hardcore) and he has his light shoved up my nose (that's what she said, Bee) and he says:
" Your membranes are so swollen I can't even see into your sinuses (I'm thinking he means there are too many boogers to get a good look but was just being nice) Hmmm, have you ever used a Neti Pot?"

WTF, does he think my sinuses got swollen from sniffing some illegal and potentially titillating substance with what must surely be some bong type apparatus? The indignity, the nurse already asked me if I still menstruated and now this??

Oh, it's one of those teapots for your nose. Yeah I saw that on Regis and Kelly and it weren't
pretty let me tell you.

Later I'm at home after showing my daughter and her friends the teapot for my nose, yeah they wanted to try it. I mix up the water and saline in the NasaFlo Neti Pot. I bring it up to my nostril and lean over the sink. It pours in one side and comes out the other. It's not that bad, Dr. Grimm swears by it. But you see, I have a small nose and the water goes in faster than it exits so I'm forced to snort the liquid which spews all over the sink, mirror, and surrounding counter top and is very loud. Kelly made it look easy but I'm sure there's some trick I don't know about. And I have to do it twice a day. help

eww

Monday, September 22, 2008

Have a question? Just axe Lizzie.

Lizzie Borden took an axe
And gave her mother forty whacks.
And when she saw what she had done
She gave her father forty-one.



I am now the owner of the original (only one made) Lizzie Borden fairy. She is fabulous and is now hanging in my kitchen. With some skeleton friends. Read below to see what her creator says about this art piece:

"Although Lizzie Borden was acquitted, she was widely believed to be guilty of the hatched murders of her father and stepmother; no one else was ever arrested or tried, and she has remained notorious in American folklore.
This fairy is a very specialized fairy and has many interesting features incorporated into her. I have thought about making her for quite some time.She has vintage sheet music and reproduction newspaper articles from the time of the murders. Inside the box is a repro court drawing of Lizzie's trial.
*My favorite part of this fairy is the cork stopped vial of brick dust gathered from the historic site of the double axe murders of Abby and Andrew Borden. (The proceeds from the sale of the brick dust go toward renovation of the Lizzie Borden house that is currently a bed and breakfast...I have heard is a fantastic place in which to visit)
She has touches of German Glitter, and her skirt is fashioned out of German crepe paper.Fairies are created through a process of many steps. A small slide box with a hanger is attached to her back and it holds a glass vial with cork stopper that contains some brick dust from the actual home of Lizzie Borden.
Copyright ©2008 Valerie Sokol- VeryMerryFairies [!at] etsy.comAll Fairies come in a clear cellophane bag with topper and handle...suitable for gift giving.Fairy measures 7" Slide box is 2 1/8 x 1 1/8 inches ".
This is a print of an actual photo of Lizzie in front of the actual house where the murders took place. The house is currently a bed and breakfast. Anyone care to join me for a weekend?

Saturday, September 13, 2008

Wednesday, September 10, 2008

Whimsy II

So I took some of your suggestions to whimsify Skeleton Head Crow (SHC). Someone suggested glasses:

Then of course I tried a festive little party hat.

Now this next one took some monkeying. Here you see a jaunty pony head on SHC. Of course the licensed My little Ponies come with non-removeable heads so I had to use a dollar store My Little Phony.

Whimsy is not as easy as it may seem.

Saturday, September 6, 2008

Whimsy Anyone?

As you may know I have an unhealthy addiction to crafting. Constantly. Usually it confines itself to sweet cupcake and other party decorations. I really want to break the mold and try some whimsy. You know like a woman's face on a bird smoking a cigar or a skeleton break dancing. Something fun and unexpected. Feast your eyes on this masterpiece of whimsy (trumpets trump). Skeleton Head Crow

Wow, look at that jaunty little fellow. He just looks so ......stupid. So I decided to give him a crow's beak, a little extra whimsy coming up
Now he's reached even higher levels of FAIL. What to do? Help me out people I've got whimsy block. This last pic shows him headless with a toothpick sticking out. Should I add bloody entrails? How bout confetti?
Dang